Jocie's Blog

So I am heading out to Mexico this evening: I sort of have to, after all, I am homeless.   But how lucky am I to have so may choices?!   Still… it is a weird position to be in.   The end of a crazy year is drawing nearer.. a year I have looked upon as one that worked hard to shut a few doors and open some new ones.   It is the end of yet another decade full of gifts and other surprises of life.   I went to Thanksgiving at Kymme’s place, and it reminded me of other Thanksgivings where I wasn’t the token non-family member.. When I was a kid, growing up in Fernie, our house was always full at Thanksgiving.   The October holiday was full of the colour of autumn: the gold, orange and red leaves, the snow on the mountains.. the cold air telling reporting that yes, summer was totally over but that it would be ok.. ski season was on it’s way.     In my memory I can feel the warmth of the wood walls, smell the turkey.. hear the mu...

After the drive through the canyon, we headed through the forested valley north of Sedona and then into the little town itself.  Sedona is known for it's vortexes.. but I have no idea what that is.  All we knew was that after being wet and cold, we were heading to a hotel room in the little town.  It was a good break.. out of the tents and into a bed was great.  And the sun came out.   I had been to Sedona years ago as well.  But, I was uncomfortable there.. it felt sad and lonely, and I thought perhaps it was just me.  I had been away from my family for a while and was missing them.  But I was going home.. the feelings didn't really fit with the excitement I felt about seeing my family again.  And then this time it happened again.. a feeling of sorrow, loneliness.. These feelings don't really feel as though they were coming from me: they seemed to be rising up from the ground itself.  It was a weird feeling, especially when surr...

The first thing we saw on the road was a fellow pushing a Norton.. then we saw a couple of old Harley Davidson’s.    I mean, really old Harley’s.     Then a Henderson.. a bunch of Indians.. I mean, old bikes.    They had seats like a tractor and the wheels were miles apart.. very cool!    Cool that was,    until we came to the Grand Canyon Park entrance.    The buggers all snuck in in front of us.. we had to wait for ages to pay our $30 and head into the park.    Years ago I drove past the canyon.  I wanted to see it so bad, but was in a bit of a hurry and dreamed of viewing it with family, rather than on my own.  Sharing such special moments, for me, makes them even more special.. more, real.  I was excited to be here with someone that I knew valued these sights as much as I did. Just inside the park was a turn off.. by now it was raining hard and a fog was rolling in.  We parke...

Still in Page After our amazing visual journey through Antelope Canyon,  we took a short walk to Horseshoe-Bend.  This is a place where the Colorado River, in it's meandering journey to the sea, does an almost complete round-a-bout.  It is an amazing sight that you gaze upon from the top of a cliff.  My camera lens could not let me capture the entire bend.. but everyone else was taking pictures..  Watching them all I did worry about tourists selfie-sticking themselves right over the edge or even just slipping and falling.  Paula and I hiked down to the cliff edge, but we stayed far enough back from the edge to take it all in without fear.  You could see the rafters below in the blue rafts.  The scene  was, yet again, spectacular.    Afterward we had Mexican food like I swear they have in Mexico itself.. It is just about all we have been eating on this journey.. and we are both loving it!  We had spen...

I decided to surround myself with creative people, interesting people, supportive people.. people that ask questions and are excited by life.  People that say ‘yes’.. instead of.. “what are you doing that for?" or even more condescending..   " I hope you find what you are searching for?”.. Paula and I in Antelope Canyon 2016 I want to be around people that just say “ya.. sounds like a plan!”  One of those sort of people that is up for just about anything that involves art.. is Paula.. my ‘sorta’ daughter-in-law.   Paula.. the girl that gave me my grandson Adam. Paula.. the hairdresser that understands that my hair isn’t like other people’s.. just as I am not exactly like anyone else.. just as no one is exactly like any one else.. nor should they be! Paula.. the woman that dragged me along to Paris. Paula.. the artist that I have now dragged along on a painting road trip: Arizona or bust! We are here now.. in the sun, just south ...

By the sixth day of the course, I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be leaving.. I had worked too hard and come too far.   I had done the inside of the nose thing.. the entrance to the nose.   I had gone from focusing for less than a minute to over twenty minutes.. by having my mind ‘look’ down my head, my face.. over my neck and down one arm and then the other.   I then focused on the front of my body.. then the back and down the legs right to my toes and starting over again.   Little twinges and zingers I was told, were the molecules rearranging themselves and my body getting rid of the rubbish.   It was explained to me much better, but there you have it, my interpretation.   But when my mind started to wander, after hours and hours of meditation, I felt the little twinges become stronger and stronger, hurting me more and more.   And then suddenly it is like something exploded.. wherever my mind ‘touched’ I felt emotional and physical ago...

Every night, after our evening meditation,   we had an hour long discourse.    At this time, we were allowed to move.. stretch our legs out, scratch if we had an itch.   The Guru was a great speaker and used metaphors, stories and humor  in his examples to help us understand what we were doing and why.  While we  weren’t allowed to speak, or even look at each other, he often made us smile and even giggle now and then. He asked us if we ever had a visitor come see us at home bringing unwanted gifts.   He reminded us that if these gifts were anger or jealousy, we could smile, send the giver on his way and make sure he took the ‘gifts’ with him. There were men and women.. these are just a few of us on the last day. We were happy!!   I loved this… it simplifies issues that appear so complicated.     I am having family issues right now.   At a time when I hunger for forgiveness, acceptance and love, I  ...